DES MOINES, Iowa (The Borowitz Report)—An endorsement from former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin is expected to widen Donald J. Trump’s already impressive lead among so-called “idiot voters,” an aide to the billionaire said on Tuesday.
While Trump was previously thought to have a lock on the idiot vote heading into the Iowa caucuses, a recent surge by Senator Ted Cruz, of Texas, has put the idiots back in play.
But even as the Trump campaign staffers celebrate the Palin endorsement, they recognize that they still have their work cut out for them to secure victory in Iowa. “Getting the idiots to support Trump is only half the battle,” the aide said. “Now we have to make sure that they make it to the caucuses without getting lost on the way.”
If Trump wins the GOP nomination, which is entirely possible given the idiocy of the GOP electorate (for whom I have ZERO respect), this could be the most interesting election ever.
A completely unqualified buffoon (Trump) vs. a Wall Street Masseuse (Clinton) or a Democratic Socialist with the guts to stand up for US (Sanders).